Most well-known etiquette consultants will tell you that crashing any event, no matter how minor, is something that is not to be done. 

Today is a crazy and maniacal pile of impossible tasks.  So, I didn’t truly believe I’d even have to time to eat lunch, never mind go out.  However, there was a brief respite around 11:50, so I decided to use the time to go outside.  I headed to my favorite place that’s within a block’s radius.  The only thing I eat there is the green beans, therefore it is lucky that I am in the mood to eat green beans.  After waiting in line for ten minutes, I finally get the green beans.  Now, there is no place to sit.  Unless…

A quick scan of the room and I find some co-workers at a table.  These co-workers are not friends of mine and, in truth, I only know one out of three names for the men in question.  However, if I bring the green beans back to my desk I will have no chance to eat them.  So, I annouce, “I’m sitting!”  All three men look up at me and proceed to scoot over to let me sit with them.  I pray, I eat, and I try to decide if they are trying to include me in the conversation or not.  Because, after so rudely crashing their lunch, I cannot afford to not anwer if they pose a question.  I ate mostly in silence, but since they were making an attempt to talk about the Museum (so that I could add my two cents?), I spoke, agreeing for the most part, and then I was finished.  At this point, I thanked them all for letting me crash their lunch.  This was received with nods, assurances that it was more than okay, and a hearty ’see you in the elevator’ – which could be a lewd statement in any other setting, but since I rarely see these men (and when I do see them, it’s usually in the elevator) – I just smiled, waved, and left.

In conclusion, I have no tact and even when I try to be nice, it comes out all phony.